Elimidate

Wait! Dun go, dun-- hey come back.. come bacckkkkk!

Ok, ok, enuff of the Magic: the Gathering crap, im losing social circles fast. Tis week let's hav a gameshow, sounds great? Wifout further ado.. -drums rolling- let's welcome the host, SIR LIONCOURT! -claps n cheers-

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Thank u! Thank u! GRRREAT to see u guys back again after one week, welcome back to ELIMIDATE! -more claps n cheers- Well, the exam period aint much fun wifout my handsome mug, aint it? -flashes a glittering smile. a couple of ladies in the audience faint- Anyway, we're back n tt's wat counts. Tis week on Elimidate, we have 4 VERY interesting contestants. They r none other than the 3 brothers fr the notorious SKOF n their church fren! -the contestants walk onto the stage. the crowd roars- Ok, ok, calm down, we all know how cool these guys r rite, but hey aren't u a bit over-reacting? -a lady flings her panties at the SKOF member wif the shaved head- ...Right.

AND THE CONTESTANTS R:
(NOTE: the contestants do not wish for their off-screen lives to be disrupted n thus we hav to protect their identities.)


The Lamester: Pxxshx
The Idiot: Lioxxl
The Poet: Jxxgyu
The Stoner: Alxx
(Top left to bottom right)

Ahem, ahem.. looks like we slipped wif Jxxgyu's photo but hey, the guy looks better wif thick eyebrows, rite? Hahaha...ha..

Tonite, the guys will try to win the heart of a v special girl. Not only is she a pretty face, she has some pretty hot personal history. -reads fr a piece of note- "Won American Idol season 1. Was supermodel for Vogue. Was Ms Jamaica in 1950--" -pauses- ...Ms Jamaica? ...1950?? -looks at the audience, looks at the note again, n calmly crushes the piece of paper- Hahaha.. who cares bout personal history when the lady has got the looks n the body rite? Take a look a the screen!

AND THE HEART TO MELT TONITE IS:
(NOTE: Identity-protection measures enabled.)

The Sweetheart

Ms Caxxie

Haha.. not exactly v photogenic, eh? Well.. we all hav our MINOR flaws so let's not be too critical.. haha.. Wat was tt? She's fat? -sweating profusely- I guess the paperbag does make her seem a TAD larger on the horizontal side haha.. -boos fr the audience r heard- hey, hey, but she's a pretty face ok! Pretty face! -raising a hand in dignity-

Let's get started already. U all know the rules, the guys will try to win The Sweetheart's heart by coming up wif a pick-up line each n she'll award a point to the guy wif the line she likes most. Tis will carry on for 3 rounds n at the end of it, The Sweetheart will go on a hot date wif the guy wif the most points. Once again, ladies n gentlemen, welcome to ELIMIDAAAATE!! -claps n cheers. the Elimidate theme song blasts in the background-

ROUND 1

The setting is a ballroom, it is the company's annual Dinner & Dance. Ms Caxxie goes out to the balcony for a breather. She sips her champagne while admiring the starlit nite-sky. The guys will take turns to approach her wif a pick-up line, hoping to end up wif a date..

Pxxshx:
Hey babe, wanna get LUCKY!?

Lioxxl:
Bond. James Bond.

Jxxgyu:
Babe, ya beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.

Alxx:
So, you're a girl huh?

The results:
Jxxgyu receives 1 point
Alxx receives 1 sheepish stare
Right on target, Jxxgyu scores. Looks like poetry still does the job in melting the hearts of ladies on romantic occasions, eh?

ROUND 2

It is the great outdoors tis time. Ms Caxxie sits outside her tent n reads a romance novel in the dancing glow of the campfire. The music of nature n a light breeze forms the perfect setting for the guys to approach the lady..

Pxxshx:
Was ya father an alien? Becos there's nothing like u on Earth!

Lioxxl:
-Lioxxl goes up to the girl n says- Let me tell you a story: there was a frog on tis side of the mountain -places his finger on her left shoulder- N n there was a frog on tis side of the mountain -places his finger on her right shoulder. then he says- Nvm, tt was a stupid story any way. -While his right finger is still behind the girl on her right side, Lioxxl just put his arm ard her n leaves it there..-

Jxxgyu:
Do u hav a map? I jus keep getting lost in ya eyes.

Alxx:
I'm not trying to pick u up. U're like too heavy. Huh huh huh huh. Get it?

The results:
Lioxxl receives 1 point
Jxxgyu receives 1 yawn
Alxx receives 1 tight slap
Damn, tt was cunning! Lioxxl really lived up to the title of "SKOF leader". Oops, looks like The Poet needs a change of strategy, she's getting bored! Haha, gd joke there Alxx, jus not sure wat u're trying to achieve.

ROUND 3

The final scenario. Ms Caxxie is sitting alone at the counter of a jazz pub. One of her hand supports her face while the other stirs the straw of her Aussie Kate in a bored fashion. Its now or never for the guys..

Pxxshx:
U know the more i drink, the prettier u get!

Lioxxl:
Hey babe, how bout a pizza n a kiss? -slap- HEY! Wat's wrong, dun u like pizza?

Jxxgyu:
My love for you is like diaharrea, I just can't hold it in.

Alxx:
Ok, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really well, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know u're giving me ya number becos I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call n we take in a movie, hav some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time tog, then a few months later get married. N finally we hav get past tis sexual tension n really develop tis intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid n stable, so we move in tog for a while, I get a promotion, u get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. U really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we hav a kid anyway, only to find that I m resentful, the sparks start to fade n to rekindle them we hav two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, hav no time 4 u, u're stressed n stop taking really good care of yaself, so to get past our slow sex life n my declining self-confidence I blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...................

The results:
Everyone receives a tight slap
Ms Sweetheart storms off the stage
Hey come back! Come baccckkkkk! -Sir Lioncourt glances at the seething audience n forces a smile- Hahaha.. well tt's all for today n-- WOAH! Stop throwing-- no dun hit me, OUCH! Not on my handsome face!! HEEEELP!!

-The curtain falls n the credits start to roll-

THE END